Monday, October 17, 2011

One step forward and two steps back

This weekend we went to Deluna Fest.
Have you ever been to a music festival?  Do you know what they have there to eat? Well, let me break it down for you: hot dogs, hamburgers, pizza, Philly cheesesteaks, gyros, burritos, polish sausages, french fries, onion rings and anything you can fry, they've got it... on a stick. They do not have salads, veggies of any kind (because the fried onions no longer count), fruit that isnt blended with a lb of sugar and alcohol or water that isn't warm and from a hose...
I tried to be good, I really did. I knew this weekend was coming and I had it all planned out. I would make healthy, filling breakfasts at home in the morning and for lunch and dinner we would leave the festival and go to one of the many seafood restaurants around so that I could get steamed seafood and veggies. Great plan, right? I know...I'm a friggin genius.
Now let me ask you, have you ever been to a seafood restaurant in the south? Did you know that everything is flash fried?!... yeah, me either.
I tried to go as healthy as possible. I even asked about steamed veggies and got the reply, "The only vegetables that we have are potatoes and corn." So I ordered salads... but even those weren't good since my only options were Ceasar, Ceasar with chicken or Ceasar with shrimp... and they were all drenched in dressing as thick as mayonnaise. Then on Saturday we forgot to eat until about 30 minutes before the band we wanted to see, so we got pizza because it was the closest thing... and for $7 you could get 2 slices! With a coke! Did I mention it was pepperoni?! Yeah....Ugh.
I was so disappointed in myself. I could feel the lbs creeping back with every bite. It also caused me to have a pretty bad stomach ache.
Sunday morning at about 5 a.m. I was dead asleep when I woke up with this weird tight feeling in my chest. I tried changing positions in bed, but the pain kept getting more intense to the point to where I could barely breathe. I thought I was having a heart attack. I woke up Britt (which is not an easy task, by the way) and we rushed to the emergency room. I was so scared, I was sobbing like crazy. I was afraid of what they would say. They took an x-ray of my chest, bloodwork, urine, an EKG and hooked me to a heart monitor for hours. It was freezing and we were so tired. After 5 hours of staring at the wall and shivering, they told me that my heart was in perfect health and I was fine. They let me go home, but not before collecting their $100 co-pay.
I was miserable, exhausted, pissed and starving. I didn't want salad or fruit... I was HUNGRY. I wanted food. A hot meal, and I wasn't up for cooking. What was I to do? Where could I get a hot meal, quick? ...McDonald's of course! It didn't even sound like a good idea at the time, but by god, we did it anyway. We binged... I believe our exact words were "well if I'm gonna be bad..." I won't go into detail, but it was bad.
I don't even think we finished crumbling the wrappers before the moaning and the "shouldn't have done that" started. There's only one word that can explain it... stupidity.
Just a few hours ago I thought I was dying and was envisioning the Dr telling me how much fatty build-up was around my heart and I'm comforting myself with french fries? Seriously, Vickie? I'm an idiot.

So, I got on the scale this morning and I'd lost half a lb. That's all...I'm surprised it wasn't a gain. I'm not happy with my weigh-in or myself. Not at all... but all I can do is try harder. I was really good today, and I enjoyed my healthy foods and salads. I will keep it up.... no matter how much I want chocolate.

Weigh-in: Today, Oct 17, 2011- 214.4 lbs (-7 lbs total)

P.S.- It took me 3 tries to spell genius right. True story. ;)


  1. A loss is amazing considering the crap that happened over the small span of 4 days. Very proud that you aren't throwing in the towel.

  2. I weighed myself and gained 2lbs. I could have sworn all that walking would have paid off but I guess not. This week will be better!

  3. Well I'm glad the pain wasn't heart related. I was worried for a bit there. And I can relate to the binge. My mom was down this past thursday-monday morning and we showed her all the delicious (horrible for you) foods here. I wouldn't be surprised if I gained 4-5 pounds. Ugh.